im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
