dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
True strength comes from lack of pants
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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