we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize