school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
