why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize