is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
