Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
