If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
