She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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