so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
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