Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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