You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Randomize
