# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
