We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
