dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I intend to get homeless drunk
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
