They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
