I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
