Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Randomize