Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
