Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
