I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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