u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
