If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
this boner is exhausting
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
