was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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