the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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