Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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