Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
