So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
