Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize