It's like God shit irony all over that family
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
