Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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