new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
