So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize