The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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