Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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