i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
