i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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