Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Randomize