no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Maybe he injected his testicle?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I'm like, not good at living.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
