I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Randomize
