I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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