Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
