He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
