You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
