You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
