The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Randomize
