the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Randomize
