I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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