she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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