I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
