She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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