We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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