My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
