If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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