I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
