I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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